Twenty(one) Questions For The (Un)Conscious Mind

  • March 13, 2016


“Riddle me this.”

– The Riddler (but not that garbage Jim Carrey version)

Recently, I blew a voiceover audition- I’m talking total crash & burn. Not “Crash Into Me is my JAM” crash, but more like, “WTF were were the Oscars thinking when they made ‘Crash’ a best picture winner” crash. It was pretty dang bad.

Right afterwards, I had a series of questions quickly fly through my head. As it turns out, these questions go through my head in rapid succession every time I blow an audition, have a bad recording session, embarrass myself, think about my career, say the wrong thing at the wrong time, say anything at any time, wake up on the wrong side of the bed, wake up at all, breathe in, breathe out, hold my breath, or have any conscious or unconscious movement or thought. I think that about covers it:

  1. What the hell was I thinking there?
  2. Am I cut out for this?
  3. Would I be better off just setting up a GoFundMe and begging for money?
  4. Would it be that bad if I just slept for the next 72 hours?
  5. I at least *looked* good, right?
  6. Oh no- did I have anything on my face or in my teeth?
  7. Wouldn’t someone have told me if I did?
  8. Is it possible I was intentionally sabotaged?
  9. I wonder who’s out there rooting against me?
  10. It will be so good to show them up one day, won’t it?
  11. Shouldn’t I be focusing more on myself and not others?
  12. But…it *will* feel good to show them up one day, right?
  13. Can I get back to the important questions, please?
  14. What should I have for dinner tonight?
  15. How about Chipotle?
  16. How about the blood of my enemies?
  17. VoiceOver really is a ride of ups & downs, isn’t it?
  18. The highs are really high, but those lows are super low, aren’t they?
  19. Would any sane person get into a career like this?
  20. Ready to do this all over again tomorrow?

Is it possible that I’m not the only one who goes through this? Whoops…let’s make that 21 questions.

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